The Other Thing I Do Is Tell People How I Feel

People freak out when you say nice things to them, especially strangers. People freak out if you are open about what you are thinking. People just don't want to let anyone in. Keep up the facade. Pretend you don't care when you do. Ignore. Withdraw. Hide.

My poetry has taught me to share. If I feel like telling someone they are special, I do it. Lots of times, someone has inspired a poem, and I feel that it is necessary for me to share those poems with people. If I feel like connecting with someone, I do it (or try to anyway---not always received very well).

In The Four Agreements, the first agreement is to

Be impeccable with your word.
Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to
speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in
the direction of truth and love.

When I read those lines, they struck such a chord in me, that I think
about them when I am really struggling with something. If I care for
someone, want to connect with them, I always come back to those lines. I have made a complete fool of myself by being honest and open, but so many times it was the best thing to do, even when I was scared to death to tell the truth. My truth, what is true for me. In the end, even if you don't like the result of telling the truth, it is better to have a result based on what you know to be true, than to have a false result.

I've recently done it again. Made a fool of myself I suppose. But I don't feel that bad (still a little shame at times, for being silly). I share and get ignored. It's nothing new. But it clears my path. Helps me to see people for who they really are. There's nothing bad about that.

And, when people are receptive, it changes your relationship in the best possible way. It allows it to blossom. Some flowers wilt, while others just bloom and bloom. I choose the blooms.